Hotch~ Potch

"Accordingly, with a mixture of the serious and the playful, which she hoped would best suit his half and half state, she replied..."

The Young Lady's Catechism
(from A Feast of Wit, 1814)

Quest. For what end did you come into the world? --- A. To get a husband. --- Q. What is the way to get a husband? --- A. To dress, dance, chat, play and go to all manner of public places, except church, for fear of being called a fanatic. Q. What is the duty of a husband? --- A. To please his wife. --- Q. What is the duty of a wife? --- A. To please herself. --- Q. Are there no more duties incumbent on you as a fine lady? --- A. Yes: I must be deaf, dumb, and blind, as occasions require; deaf to the voice of duns, and all such poor relations as most easily beset me; dumb when my husband remonstrates; and blind to the whole race of city acquaintances or country-cousins. --- Q. Are you not to have some regard to a future state? --- A. Yes; after having maintained a good reputation as long as I can, I am to exchange it for a separate maintenance, unlis I wish to marry my gallant; and then I must accuse my husband, and obtain a divorce.

Lady Benson's Parrot
(from the Sporting Magazine, 1804)

LADY Frances Benson, whose residence is at Harbledown, near Canterbury, a country surrounded by very large woods, has a green West India parrot, which, in its habits of life, differs so widely from any thing ever observed in animals of the same species, as to be well worthy of attention. This bird is perfectly tame, talks, and does all the little tricks common to birds of its kind, when in a domestic state; notwithstanding which, in all seasons of the year, hail, rain, blow or snow, as soon as it has had its breakfast in the morning, it watches for and takes the first opportunity of escaping, and flies across the country, as if in the wildest state of nature, and had never been tamed or confined, and passes the greatest part of the day in the woods; and is frequently seen in different directions, several miles from home. Towards evening --- about the usual dinner hour of the family -- Poll returns for her dinner, and voluntary prisoner of her cage; and submits with cheerfulness to the confinement of the house, till her usual hour of escape again returns.

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